As always happens with my blog posts I started thinking about one post and ended up writing something totally different!! Anyone who knows me knows that I have a rather strange relationship with my dad. He is a real grumpy old man and moans constantly about me and my things (equipment for my disability and crafting and even basics) and moans about helping me too. However much as he’s a pain in the backside our relationship is probably the closest it’s been. In the past we had all out rows and an incident that will forever live as one of my worst ever, but now despite the moans and the annoyance I can actually say I do love my dad. It’s not that I didn’t love him in the past but the bad in our relationship often outweighed the good and our arguments often left me totally heartbroken or more angry than even I would admit to. I think that now though I’ve accepted that my dad and my relationship with him will never be “normal”. I’m not daddies little girl, that accolade is firmly my sister’s. I think however that this acceptance has made me put less pressure on our relationship and I do love him. All the silly, moany, annoying, kind, strange, funny and OCD sides of him.
I long ago learnt that my dad is not the all knowing, when he criticises or upsets me (there are still times) I can now put my sensible head on and think if he’s right or not. It’s not like he’s not done anything for me. He has taken me to more medical appointments than I can count and has stood up for me and by me when others haven’t. He’s been one of the only ones (with my mum and a few others I won’t mention) who never doubted my EDS diagnosis and has been a taxi service for me both before and after my car. Yes he does still upset me, for example the consumer issue I mentioned in another post is really upsetting me and mum is having to twist his arm all the time to help me. I know from the outside it seems strange to people that I can say that I love him but I do, I just have to take him how he is and he has to accept that at 38 I might not always agree with him!!
I know this might not be the most normal of fathers day tributes, but then I don’t have the most normal relationship with my dad!!!